A month ago...
One month ago we laid my Dad to rest in the arms of our Heavenly Father. I am sure he was greeted by my his parents, my brothers Bryan and Leon, his sister Vallery and his granddaughter Ashley and grandson Corey. It was extremely difficult (even now) but the experience was one of growth. My Dad was always trying to get the family together, unfortunately this was probably not his idea of a family gathering nor was it ours. But I know he always talked about how he would hope that if he was on his "death bed" he hoped that he would be surrounded by his family in his last moments of life. Well, I believe it was meant to be that way. I know a lot of people hesitate asking what happened and yes it is hard to talk about it but for me it is also a process of healing for me. I have wanted to blog about it for a while but haven't been able to yet so here I am talking about it. (again for some people).
After I got there Wednesday the family started gathering at the hospital. We all knew it wasn't good since he collapsed on his birthday Tuesday night. But once I got there everyone knew it was time to gather around his bedside. All my siblings except one were able to make it as well as my Aunt Gloria (his sister in law) my sister in law Teena (my late brother Bryan's wife) and a handfull of grandchildren and a couple of my cousins. It gave my mother the strength to let him go. I know of all of us it was hardest for her and she had the final say. The experience was heart wrenching but at the same time a powerful spiritual experience. You could feel the room had more people there than there really was. I know we had angels among us. I was a "Daddy's girl" and although I have tried to prepare myself for this moment for a long time it just doesn't come easy no matter how much you talk to yourself about it. We knew he wasn't doing well with his health. My parents had just told us he was diagnosed with prostate cancer that was a stage 6 (I think). Although they couldn't tell me what that meant, I knew it wasn't good for his already ailing body. On top of that he had a brain aneurysm they had been keeping an eye on for 7 years and was now showing signs for concern. He was scheduled to go to a specialist in California to determine which to tackle first, the aneurysm or the cancer. So as horrible as it sounds I am really glad that he was able to "let go" of this life and not have to suffer through either one of those options because frankly I am not sure his body could have taken it. So although his death came sooner than we expected we knew it was a likely cause in the near future. I do wish he would have made it after our scheduled family Christmas party so I could have given him one last hug alive but at least I was able to wish him a Happy Birthday and sing to him one last time the afternoon of the night he collapsed. I love you Daddy! I know you are pain free and continue to watch over us while doing the Lord's great work on the other side. I really miss hearing your voice and seeing your face and dealing with my "cantacorous old man" you were. (I am sure I spelt that wrong LOL) but we loved you for it.
My Dad was an veteran so he was honored with a flag.
My mother was then presented with the flag. (one of the most emotional moments besides being at his bedside when he took his last breath)
Natali and Noah putting a rose on his coffin. He loved all of his grandchildren so much so all of the grandsons were pallbearers (or honorary ones) and all put a rose (as well as his own children) on his coffin.
I was so touched by this picture. My sister comforting Natali and my niece Audrey. My sister teased me afterward about taking a picture of them crying. But this is one of the most precious pictures that I took. I don't regret it.
