Selfish?
I have so much I want to catch up on with blogging so I figured today I would start with me...LOL!
Such a selfish act...
I can honestly say the past five years have had it's ups and downs. My goals consisted of completing our family with our children and staying healthy. It hasn't been a walk in the park although I have done plenty of walking in the park. LOL! (figuritively and literally).
After heart surgery in 2007, I knew it was important to keep my weight in check to stay healthy. I was borderline my weight limit at the time of surgery. 174 lbs. The biggest I had been ever in my life. Not that that is large to some in fact to some they consider that extremely skinny. The intent here is not to make anyone feel bad if they weigh more I don't want that guilt. But I knew if I was going to birth two more babies I needed to get it down. So after about 2 months of recovery. I stepped on an elliptical trainer for the first time. I think I made it 2 minutes before I had to stop for air. I continued to try when after some time I had dropped 10 lbs and was able to sustain 20 minutes on the elliptical. It was difficult to say the least but I did it! I finally dropped 25 lbs total putting me at 155 lbs. I was thrilled! I remember looking at the scale when I first dropped two lbs and the overwhelming feeling of I CAN DO THIS! washed over me. Finally after 18 months post op...I was cleared (hesitantly by my Dr.'s) to have another baby.
Miraculously after Sophia the lbs just dropped off. I actually was less than what I had started out at the beginning of my pregnancy with her when I got pregnant with August, when that happened I was sitting at 147 lbs. I secretly hoped it would stay that way after having him (that the lbs would just drop off like they did with Sophia) Half way into his pregnancy I had only gained 8 lbs. I thought for sure I would be lucky this time too. But after my blood clot and taking it easy on the exercising not to upset the said clot...I rapidly gained more weight with the pregnancy. I still hoped that maybe it would drop off easily like it did with Sophia.
Maybe because of the combination of medications and not being able to breastfeed August it decided to hang on. So here I am on my weight loss journey once again. With wonderful support from friends and family I am well on my way. In ways this weight loss journey makes me feel REALLY guilty and selfish. I have friends and family that are trying to lose too and are struggling far more than I am. I think sometimes they may want to slap me for even bringing up weight loss for myself. So I hope I am not offending those I love around me as I try to stay healthy myself while supporting them in the process. I know our goals are quite similiar in the fact that I want to
1. Be healthy
2. Feel good physically, emotionally, spirtually, and mentally.
3. I want play with my children and not be out of breath 5 minutes at the park.
4. I want to be able to wrestle with my husband (get your mind out of the gutters people!!) and pin him to the floor!
5. I want to be a good mother and wife that has the stamina to clean the house, keep it clean, cook healthy dinners, exercise with my family by walking or heaven forbid do a 5K walk for a good cause like say....Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, the Cancer Foundation, or the like..., go shopping and get everything I need in one trip without being out forever!
6. To live a long healthy life and serve a mission with my husband not once but two or three times while bouncing grandbabies on my knees!
7. And be able to play with my grandchildren.
I know some of these are short term goals, some are long term goals. But they are mine! They are my DREAMS!
Nathan asked me once if I was living my dreams? I can say I have started living them and I would like to finish them. And this is one part of my journey that I feel will help me accomplish my long term goals.
So for some it may seem silly that I am concerned with "weight loss" but it more about staying healthy and eating healthy.
I must admit this time has been a little harder than after I had surgery. For the first three weeks I lost nothing. It was discouraging but eventually I came off my medications and changed things up a little and I started seeing the lbs drop off slowly but they were/are dropping. It is encouraging when you even see a .3 loss to keep you going.
I am using myfitnesspal.com and it has been so helpful keeping me in check. I have my days like everyone that I eat over my calorie goal or I don't do my exercise for the day. But I can happily say I have lost 9.5 lbs since starting on my birthday. (end of June). I am almost half way to my goal.
Such a selfish act...
I can honestly say the past five years have had it's ups and downs. My goals consisted of completing our family with our children and staying healthy. It hasn't been a walk in the park although I have done plenty of walking in the park. LOL! (figuritively and literally).
After heart surgery in 2007, I knew it was important to keep my weight in check to stay healthy. I was borderline my weight limit at the time of surgery. 174 lbs. The biggest I had been ever in my life. Not that that is large to some in fact to some they consider that extremely skinny. The intent here is not to make anyone feel bad if they weigh more I don't want that guilt. But I knew if I was going to birth two more babies I needed to get it down. So after about 2 months of recovery. I stepped on an elliptical trainer for the first time. I think I made it 2 minutes before I had to stop for air. I continued to try when after some time I had dropped 10 lbs and was able to sustain 20 minutes on the elliptical. It was difficult to say the least but I did it! I finally dropped 25 lbs total putting me at 155 lbs. I was thrilled! I remember looking at the scale when I first dropped two lbs and the overwhelming feeling of I CAN DO THIS! washed over me. Finally after 18 months post op...I was cleared (hesitantly by my Dr.'s) to have another baby.
Miraculously after Sophia the lbs just dropped off. I actually was less than what I had started out at the beginning of my pregnancy with her when I got pregnant with August, when that happened I was sitting at 147 lbs. I secretly hoped it would stay that way after having him (that the lbs would just drop off like they did with Sophia) Half way into his pregnancy I had only gained 8 lbs. I thought for sure I would be lucky this time too. But after my blood clot and taking it easy on the exercising not to upset the said clot...I rapidly gained more weight with the pregnancy. I still hoped that maybe it would drop off easily like it did with Sophia.
Maybe because of the combination of medications and not being able to breastfeed August it decided to hang on. So here I am on my weight loss journey once again. With wonderful support from friends and family I am well on my way. In ways this weight loss journey makes me feel REALLY guilty and selfish. I have friends and family that are trying to lose too and are struggling far more than I am. I think sometimes they may want to slap me for even bringing up weight loss for myself. So I hope I am not offending those I love around me as I try to stay healthy myself while supporting them in the process. I know our goals are quite similiar in the fact that I want to
1. Be healthy
2. Feel good physically, emotionally, spirtually, and mentally.
3. I want play with my children and not be out of breath 5 minutes at the park.
4. I want to be able to wrestle with my husband (get your mind out of the gutters people!!) and pin him to the floor!
5. I want to be a good mother and wife that has the stamina to clean the house, keep it clean, cook healthy dinners, exercise with my family by walking or heaven forbid do a 5K walk for a good cause like say....Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, the Cancer Foundation, or the like..., go shopping and get everything I need in one trip without being out forever!
6. To live a long healthy life and serve a mission with my husband not once but two or three times while bouncing grandbabies on my knees!
7. And be able to play with my grandchildren.
I know some of these are short term goals, some are long term goals. But they are mine! They are my DREAMS!
Nathan asked me once if I was living my dreams? I can say I have started living them and I would like to finish them. And this is one part of my journey that I feel will help me accomplish my long term goals.
So for some it may seem silly that I am concerned with "weight loss" but it more about staying healthy and eating healthy.
I must admit this time has been a little harder than after I had surgery. For the first three weeks I lost nothing. It was discouraging but eventually I came off my medications and changed things up a little and I started seeing the lbs drop off slowly but they were/are dropping. It is encouraging when you even see a .3 loss to keep you going.
I am using myfitnesspal.com and it has been so helpful keeping me in check. I have my days like everyone that I eat over my calorie goal or I don't do my exercise for the day. But I can happily say I have lost 9.5 lbs since starting on my birthday. (end of June). I am almost half way to my goal.
